Loneliness is about a lack of intimacy.While there are many common elements of loneliness across individuals, I think it’s safe to say that no two people’s experience of loneliness is exactly the same. I think that’s important to be clear about the fundamentally subjective and individual-specific nature of loneliness. Loneliness is never something that can be definitively observed by an external observer because-like all emotions-it comes from a person’s subjective perception. As we mentioned above, many people seek out solitude because they find it restorative or helpful in promoting creativity, for example. But it’s good to be clear about this since many people feel good when they are alone or distant from others. This may seem obvious that loneliness is an aversive or uncomfortable feeling. In fact, many people describe the most acute bouts of loneliness occurring precisely when they are surrounded by people.
It’s also worth noting that isolation is not a requirement for loneliness: you can feel lonely even when you’re surrounded by other people. When this happens, we often describe it as solitude. But many people seek out isolation and experience it as a positive thing. Many people who are isolated experience loneliness. In other words, loneliness is different than isolation. I think it’s important to distinguish upfront that we are thinking about loneliness as an internal emotion rather than an external state of affairs. Loneliness is an emotion characterized by the feeling of pain caused by a perceived lack of intimacy with other people or ourselves. Specifically, I think we can generate a definition that gets at a bit more of the psychological side of loneliness. This is a good starting point but I think we can do better. Merriam-Webster’s dictionary defines loneliness like this: And while any definition will of course leave things out or not fit with everybody’s experience, it’s important to at least come up with a working definition that most of us can agree on. There’s no official definition of loneliness.
#Im so lonely how to#
#Im so lonely free#
Table of Contentsįeel free to use the links below to jump to a specific section you’re interested in: Finally, we’ll end by exploring how to deal with loneliness in a healthy way and some tips for helping friends or loved ones who are lonely. Then we’ll explore different causes of loneliness and common types of loneliness, as well as the negative effects loneliness can have on our lives. In this article, we’ll take a look at what loneliness is and how it’s different than similar concepts like isolation and solitude. What’s more, loneliness and the fear of loneliness are often powerful influences in our lives, frequently leading to poor decisions and self-sabotage. This is partly because our experience of loneliness tends to be so varied and individual-specific.
While everybody basically knows what it means to be lonely, it’s surprisingly hard to define it precisely. Loneliness is one of the most powerful experiences in human psychology.
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